In a marriage, partners should be equal. Yes, there has to be give and take, and sometimes, the giver has to turn receiver. A 50:50 split cannot happen, but somehwere along the years, it has to average out to that.
In most marriages that I watch, I find that there is always one who loves more. She or he listens, does and loves more. She/he is the lover and the other, the beloved. She/he is the one who will be devastated when the relationship ends. She/he is the one who's left out of the parties when common friends get together. She/he is the one who drops out of sight. She/he is the one who feels a failure. She/he is the one whose work slips as a result.
Does this mean that it's stupid to give yourself up to a relationship? No, but it's stupid to give yourself up just because you have a relationship.
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