Everyday dreams

at five to five every morning
my alarm screams
it howls
shakes the house
frightens the dawn
wakes the watchman
who waits impatiently
ringing the doorbell
with a screaming finger
in my dreams
the alarm is turned off
the door is opened
the key given
the gate unlocked
things are as they were
I sleep through it all wonderfully
till my mother’s gentle voice wakes me
I turn off the alarm
and begin my day
with the realisation
that I cannot have my father back.

Smile

It was commonplace

To be stopped

While crossing the road

To be asked

If I was your child

Because an old friend of yours

Saw a familiar smile in a strange face.

You will always be with me

For I carry your smile forever.

I am the flesh of your flesh

You live on in me,

So too in others, born of you, to you.

Across the Valley

Narrow the path

Hard the stones

Sharp the thorns

Difficult the way

The Christ my shepherd

His cross my succour

His peace my salvation

His father’s house my eternal home.

(My father passed away peacefully in his sleep last Thursday. His concern for all and his cheerfulness will continue to guide me everyday.This poem is a simple expression of the deep and abiding faith with which he travelled the rocky road these last few months.)

Missing you

My house sighs in silence

As echoes of your laughter

Fill it still.

Day's end

At sunset
the world turns
peels the sea
inside out
drowns the orange
turns all black.
Await the sunrise.

Your trees

Today I crossed the city

to walk beneath your trees.

The rain dropped in silence

and pooled on the pavement.

But I shed no tears

for my heart stills them

As your trees talk to me

of love and life.

When I miss you

I walk beneath your trees.

Sometimes

Sometimes I want to go up in flames

Be angry and throw tantrums.
Sometimes I wish I could cling

Be needy and weak-minded.

Sometimes I long to cry

Be moody and teary-eyed.

Sometimes I'd like to walk away

Be carefree and irresponsible.
Sometimes I pray nobody knows

Just what I wish for sometimes.

Familiarity

More than sport

There’s a certain comfort

When touch sees

And reality brings peace.

A just like that poem for a forever friend

just sitting here quietly
working on something
not required urgently
when by me there swung
a few minutes free and footloose
longing to be used and to the full
for something oh anything I choose
things gay and happy, bright and joyful
on the wind flying came a simple thought
of a poem for a sometime lover forever friend
took but an instant it may be good or maybe not
and it would have gone on but here found the end

Life is pretty good

Spending time with my parents is my idea of heaven right now. I just walk into their room for no reason, and when they look a question at me, I make up something inconsequential to ask them. The truth is, I'm in their room because I just love being able to walk into the next room and see them. Of course, when I return to new city that is now becoming-my-home-almost-but-not-quite tomorrow morning, I will be back to missing them. But still, right now, I'm not. I have missed both of them so much. And knowing that my father's tests have cleared him for another six months is such a relief. Also touched base with my own surgeon and he has cleared me for two years. So as you can see, life on the whole is pretty good. I love my life. I love my family. I love my job. And my blog.

Planning early

Sitting up late and making out my
Christmas list,
An anthology of Eliot, Larkin, Hughes and Auden,
Chocolate Chili Cookies,
Leather seat covers for the car,
Natural sponge loofahs and power
Just will power
To exercise,
A licence to drive,
And curtains
For my pretty house.

On second thoughts, maybe I'll ask for
A chocolate kiss, not Hershey's, just yours, it's so much sweeter
An orange fling weekend
And you, for my Xmas high.

Sunday morning

i woke up
to the soft warm scent
of morning skin,
toast on a tray
crisp and buttered,
fruit preserves
and condensed milk,
too-hot coffee mugs
and toasty hands,
clotted cream pillows
and sunlit curtains,
a lazy sunday
and promises
of tangerine kisses.

Forever

the walls carried a soft sound
as you leaned against the door
watching me spilled across the floor
joined your smiles with my laughter
promising me the world
for now for after
for ever.

the retreat

a bend in the river
shaded by trees
becomes our retreat

the noonday sun
filters through the leaves
turning our bower
into a green-tinged grotto

a boat on the water
floats with the current
nestling us snugly
while you read a book
and i read you

This was one of the happiest days of my life. Falling in love for the very first time tends to have that effect on one. I couldn't take my eyes off his face and my book lay at the bottom of the boat, unread. It was the first time that a man was more interesting than the book I was reading. And he was the only one who has ever had that particular effect on me:-)

i miss you

in you i
lost myself
without you i
found myself
again
longing
for the abandon
of being lost.

A Rabbit Mystery

Just a chocolate pool
the simple bunny thought
sipping away not noticing
that she'd drowned to a jigsaw
in the space of a mail!

An Orange Fling

take an orange
(or an engineer)
add vodka (optional)
mix together
pour in some soda
over a twist of lemon or lime
one of those tall cool glasses
when you look at it
you feel so cold
and happy
and fresh
what a feeling
it lasts
till the fling ends.